I am actually experiencing this in my life right this minute.
The mindset coach gets stuck too and gets to learn how to navigate through it.
There are a thousand different reasons you might be feeling this. So we could go on and on about WHY, but what is more important is the mind-work around the perspective on how you SEE it. Feel consumed by your thoughts? End result, stuck. Feel like your job is just not going anywhere that you want it to go? End result, stuck. Feel like you do so much for others but don’t get the same appreciation in return? Such a stuck feeling. Want to experience MORE in your life but you don’t really take action or don’t know where to start? Again, you feel stuck. Do you see the pattern here tho? Just because you FEEL this way in your reality, doesn’t make it true. The feeling is what keeps us there. Let me explain.
I was the kid that got frustrated easily if I didn’t know something in school, and if someone didn’t help me, I just didn’t want to take the time to learn how to do it. I find this to be a toxic, self limiting trait of mine. Another example, I loathe when you order a piece of furniture or something that comes in the mail and requires directions. I give them straight to my husband because he was blessed with an amount of patience I cannot begin to fathom. To be quite frank, I want the answers to my problem and I want them now. I do not want to spend the time trying to figure it out. Here I am, a grown ass woman who has overcome a lot in her life, but I resist things that feel hard to me. I often find myself feeling stuck, and it always seems to come down to the overwhelm I FEEL. Sound familiar?
As humans we want it NOW. We want it to work when we want it to work, and we don’t really have time to stop and shift or pivot or LEARN a new approach or perspective. Part of this is stemming from a lack of gratitude.
Ok story time. I remember a point in my career as a Dental Hygienist where I hated my job. I didn’t want to be there. I wanted the day to end and be over as soon as I got there. I didn’t take pride in what I was doing even though I was very good at my job. I felt stuck in the daily grind of it all, and wanted more than anything for something to change. But the change had to happen inside of ME. Let me repeat that.
The change had to happen inside of me.
Nine times out of ten, your situation isn’t going to change. For example, your job will likely stay the same and you will live in the same house, and still have the same daily chores or tasks….but it is your perspective that is the number ONE thing that can change and it will change everything if you allow it.
It is so important to dig deeper within ourselves when we feel resistance or anger or any of the negative feelings towards our life and our situation. When I go back to why I hated my job. It wasn’t my job. It was the thoughts around it. I was resentful because I had my own business but it hadn’t reached the place I needed it to in order to leave my full time job. So I felt frustration and anger toward something I felt like I couldn’t change right then and there. Behind desperately wanting a change in my life, was the pressure to make it happen. All of those feelings are a recipe for a spiral of anxiety and a negative outlook toward daily life.
When we are in this space, we feel minimal gratitude. I mean deep down we are grateful, but that isn’t enough to shift a mindset. It takes a massive amount of gratitude. I mean like waking up and recognizing it. Brushing your teeth and recognizing it. Driving your car and the sun is shining and you realize you are grateful to have wheels to take you places and the sun reminds you that this is another day you get to shine your light on the world again. I am talking about deep, unwavering gratitude that can’t be shaken. That is what will powerfully change your life.
All of a sudden, I had then developed a deep sense of gratitude for my job.
I realized that I was miserable, and that the only person who could change it was me. I started to find so much gratitude for the people I got to impact each day with my education and my skill. I realized that many of these older patients who I treated, needed company and conversation, as some of them had no one living with them in their home. I began to find this deep appreciation for an income that I was giving to our family. A switch had been flipped, but nothing in my life had actually changed except my perspective and gratitude for where I was in my life.
So many things in life bring us to our knees with gratitude.
But it often takes a tragedy for us to really wake the hell up. And we don’t want to wait for that. If you want what you want NOW, then start with the simplest of gratitude today. I can preach about this topic all day long, but I still have to implement it for it to work. And what is really so damn amazing? The more you practice this, the less derailed you will get. Life will happen as it always does, and you might get frustrated. But then you shift faster than ever because you have developed the practice of acknowledging gratitude and implementing it into your small daily encounters.
Let’s recap a bit. You might feel stuck somewhere in your life. But are you really? Is that the truth? OR, are you limiting yourself simply because you haven’t implemented one ounce of gratitude today. OR, have you not changed the story in your head about yourself and what you are capable of doing. I often have to remind myself, “Tabitha, do the ONE thing. You don’t have to do all of the things. You don’t have to know the outcome or how it is going to work because you aren’t there yet. So, slow down and live your life one step at a time.”
Your perspective about yourself is everything.